Center Stage is Not Me
And still I said "Yes"
Unsplash: Credit Rob Laughter
Of all the things Coach helped me learn, the one that changed my life the most is the lesson I call,
“What we do for friends.”
It’s only five simple words, and yet it has me doing things I never thought I’d do. Scratch that.
It has me doing things that I absolutely hate doing.
So this is the story about how I became the narrator for Hannah’s play, Popposites, with the tagline, “Where opposites “pop.” I never loved the play’s name, and I don’t understand taglines which feel like two separate words that don’t belong together. Hannah tells me I’m being too literal again, and anyway, it means something to her.
Coach says that Popposites will someday mean something to me too, but that day hasn’t come yet. Anyway, I did something in the name of friendship because friends matter more than I realized.
Center stage: My “Popposites” debut
Hannah loves being the center of attention, and she does it well. Before she knew it, a cast of friends signed up to be in her play. They were excited until they realized how much work was involved, and it wasn’t easy for them to memorize their lines. That’s when Hannah asked me to be the stage narrator and provide our friends some quiet on-stage support.
For some unknown reason, I have the ability to memorize things. It’s easy for me. There’s a lot in life that’s hard for me, but learning the script was not one. Being center stage was, and so I said, “No, thank you.”
Of course, it didn’t end there. Hannah explained why she needed me. She suggested she’d do extra duty helping me manage my chess club. But it was Coach that got me to “Yes.” He said,
“Alfred, the thing about good friends is that you do extra things for them that you might not even do for yourself. It’s the ‘give and take’ of friendships that make them so meaningful.”
I countered,
“I’d rather make her Soho Glob cookies. They make everyone feel loved.”
Coach said Soho Globs weren’t the same. I challenged Coach, and then I asked Hannah whether I could instead make her and the cast (a lot more work!) a big batch of Globs. She burst out laughing, and then she teared up. She said,
“You just don’t understand me or what I need.”
And then, of course, I did. I also felt bad I’d made Hannah cry.
Me as narrator
I signed up and made Coach and my mom happy. Mostly, I made Hannah feel more comfortable that Popposites could be a success. I learned a lot about friends and about being on stage, and everyone said I was very good. They even gave me an MVP award — my first ever!
Coach asked me what I learned in doing this. He asks me those types of questions that I don’t always love. I answered:
Soho Globs would not have done the trick.
People show their nervousness in all kinds of ways.
Humor really does help reduce stress. I thanked Coach for his “Ha-Ha matters” lesson.
This was my biggest act of generosity ever. Nothing will top it.
This all made Coach smile. He said that I was “Equipped with a far deeper spirit of generosity than I realized” and that I would, eventually, understand this.
Then I shared this conversation with my mom. I knew she’d understand why it was so hard to be narrator. She’s built like me, which means she gets me best.
What did my mom do? She gave me a hug (first, she asked if I was accepting hugs at that moment), and then she said,
“Alfred, it doesn’t matter how smart and capable you are. Or even how giving you are. Center stage is a hard place to be. Kudos that you did it. You are such a good friend.”
Her last six words made me feel warm and happy. It’s what I wanted to be. In my next post, I will share the extra Popposites job I was given as “culture builder,” but I’ve used up all my words for today.
Ok, Hannah, the take-away message is for you — another act of friendship.
Key Message: Friends ask a lot, and they can because they also give a lot. For me, being center stage was the biggest gift I could give, but the funny thing is that it was also a gift to me. Thank you, Hannah.